I do not hate women. In fact, two of the best people I’ve known in my entire life have been women. These friends of mine are the very definition of what womanhood should be. They’re smart, witty, generous, compassionate, tough, and independent. Neither has a gossipy bone in their body and they’re both intensely loyal. I’m not half the women they are, but someday I hope to be close.
If you want to know the truth, I actually feel a bit sorry for women. They possess so much wasted potential. If women spent more time doing stuff, as opposed to staring in the mirror, they could accomplish great things. Unfortunately, women no longer want to be the best person they can possibly be. They just want to be slightly better than their neighbor.
A long time ago, Feminism wasn’t about embracing the role of perpetual victim. Nor was it about living life without consequence. Old school Feminism was about equality and giving women the resources and opportunity to realize their full potential. The women who protested in the streets, burning their bras and refusing to succumb to patriarchal ideals truly believed in the potential greatness of women and were willing to spend their lives fighting to see it given a chance.
And if those old school feminists could see us now, what do you suppose they’d say? We spend our lives primping in front of vanities just so we can sit in dimly lit kitchens trading stories about our children’s shit and rushing home early so we can catch the newest episode of ‘Flavor of Love’ on television.
Feminists didn’t fight for our right to have more responsibilities outside of raising the children for us to refuse any responsibility that didn’t revolve around children. Hell, I don’t even think Feminists wanted to see us working dead end jobs as secretaries for those with more ambition than us.
I think old school Feminists wanted to see more women with attitude. More women who invested in their mental attributes instead of the size of their thighs. More women in extreme sports. More women starting their own companies. More women dedicating their lives to charities they believed in. More women involved in politics. And by ‘being involved in politics,’ I do not mean aligning themselves as ‘Democrats’ and letting the fat cats in power do the rest of their thinking for them. I mean actually taking the time to understand the issues before casting their vote. Old school Feminists longed for the days when women did more with their lives than filling up sippy cups and making grilled cheese sandwiches.
Not that there is anything wrong with being a Mother, mind you. I just don’t think women should be Mothers and nothing else. Motherhood should enrich your life; it shouldn’t be your life. No one on this planet should dedicate their entire life to another person…even if that other person is their child. After all, how do you share your wisdom and life experiences with your offspring if you’ve never done anything but raise them?
Motherhood is not a great accomplishment and it never has been. Animals have perfected the art of procreation, for God’s sake. Why should we become egotistical about something an insect can do?
But you want to know what is pretty cool? A woman who is a Mother and a seasoned rock climber who has climbed the tallest mountains in the world is cool. A Mother that also runs a corporation is pretty cool. A woman who is a Mother and an artist is pretty cool. A woman who straps her baby to her back and travels the world is pretty fucking cool.
A woman who does nothing but sit around kvetching about episodes of American Idol is not cool. She’s sad and pathetic and a waste of so much potential. The very least she can do is go outside and plant a fucking garden. I mean, you only get one life on this planet. Everyone should at least try to make a mark while they’re here, even if it’s a small one.
Women, if you don’t want to make a mark in the world for yourselves, at least do it for your children. Your children need someone to look up to. They need someone to be proud of.
One of the friends I told you about earlier actually does have children. She had them later in life, after she had accomplished much of what she set out to do. You should hear her kids talk about her when she’s not around. If someone asks them what Mom does for a living, they tick of her accomplishments on their little fingers, voices literally glowing with pride. Almost always, they end their speech with very determined promises that they are going to be just like her when they grow up.
I remember being a small child and having people ask me what my Mother did. I would duck my head defensively because my Mother never did much of anything at all. She put on make-up and she dressed pretty, I guessed. But, other than that, she was hardly a conversational piece. I grew up wanting to be her exact opposite.
Be a conversational piece for your children if you don’t have the guts to be a conversational piece for your own personal pride.
There are women are out there who are trying to make their mark on this world. I salute those women even as I mourn the fact that there aren’t enough of them.
There aren’t nearly enough of them.
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