Archive for July, 2007

Want to Stop Your Children From Smoking? Scar Them for Life!

Monday, July 30th, 2007

Even as a 4 year old child, I idolized my Father. They say that mimicry is the sincerest (and most annoying) form of flattery, so I tried my best to do everything my Father did. If his favorite television show was ‘Mash,’ I begged to stay up late to watch it with him. If he […]

There Will be No Justice Until Michael Vick Ends Up in a Jail Cell

Friday, July 27th, 2007

I’ve always been a bit of an animal lover. Now don’t get me wrong; I’m not one of those PETA freaks. Just because I love animals doesn’t mean I won’t eat them. Although I will concede that animals who have been raised as food should be cared for properly and humanely. My Mother never really […]

Men are Better Than Women

Thursday, July 26th, 2007

Would it encourage the rumors that I am actually a man if I admit I think this website is hysterically funny? Yeah? Oh well. I spent the better part of the day browsing his archives and laughing my ass off. From 10 Reasons Why Watches are So Manly: 9. Watches come off. In the old […]

Bloggers are so Cliche

Wednesday, July 25th, 2007

People have often described me as a blogger. I generally shy away from the term because, to me, bloggers are boring, self obsessed narcissists who use their website mainly as a means to discuss the inconsequential minutiae of their day to day lives. On my site, I try really hard to have a point at […]

Waiting in Line for the New Harry Potter Book is the Very Definition of Shame

Monday, July 23rd, 2007

There are two situations in life where having a kid in tow is absolutely invaluable. They are as follows: 1. When you’ve lost your ID, but you absolutely, positively need a drink. All you have to do is grab the nearest brat you can find and take him to a restaurant for lunch. Tell your […]